A Horseshit Afternoon at O.co Coliseum
Athletics 13 Astros 1 WP: Samardijza (4-8) LP: Feldman (4-8) contributed by Mr. Happy Behind the strong right arm of the Shark and the booming bats of the Athletics, the Astros were routed 13-1 in a...
View ArticleFriday Night Pilgrimage
Marlins 2 Astros 0 contributed by NeilT I was really excited about this recap. I had most of it written two weeks ago, and it was brilliant: politically astute, timely, and hilariously funny. Then I...
View ArticleMerde
Les Marlines 4, L’Astros 2 W: Turner (4-6) L: McHugh (4-9) Submitted by Reuben It was a crappy Sunday all around. For one thing, I returned from a wonderful trip to France only to discover that my...
View ArticleIts Obie’s Fault
A’s 3, Astros more than 3 W: Oberholtzer, L: Chavez recap I must say Oberholtzer did not look happy pitching last night. I have no idea if that was just his game face or he was sad because he pitches...
View ArticleAstros Clobber the Athletics
Dallas pitches a gem in Astros 8-1 victory WP: Keuchel (10-7) LP: Hammel (0-4) contributed by Sphinx Drummond I like day games when I remember them. It gives me something different to listen to as I go...
View ArticleBlue Jays @ Astros Series Preview
submitted by Bench Sorry for mailing this in late. I frankly didn’t realize there was a Thursday game and then got hit with a bunch of last minute, immediate deadline work. I will happily forfeit my...
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Red River Poutine
Astros 3 Canadians 1 contributed by NeilT Ruggedly handsome Texas Ranger Captain Burk Lanceman stood at the helm of the 21 foot Austin Whaler as around it the drought-fed surge of the Red River flowed....
View ArticleSmooth It Out
Astros 8, Blue Jays 2 W: Oberholtzer (4-7) L: Dickey (9-11) It was a highlight reel kind of night for the Home Nine, who may have moved up another rung on the ladder into the lower reaches of...
View ArticleIt Is I…Scott Feldman
Astros 6, Blue Jays 1 W: Feldman (5-8) L: Stroman (7-3) Submitted by Reuben After spending most of May through July scuffling and/or on the disabled list, Scott Feldman, owner of (by far) the biggest...
View ArticlePhightin’ Phillies Phlush Astros
Big first inning by Phills dooms Astros LP: Brad Peacock (3-8) WP: David Buchanan (6-5) contributed by Sphinx Drummond Jose Altuve led off the game with a single, used a bit of thievery to advance to...
View ArticleP. Rick Pac
Houston Team 4 Dallas Team 3 contributed by NeilT Howdy! Man, this week has been busy, what with patrolling the Red River to stop iceback French-speakin’ children crossing over from Canada, and...
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Dallas Beats Dallas
Rangers 6, Astros 2 W: Martinez, N (2-8) L: Keuchel (10-8) Submitted by Reuben The Astros started out with a 2-0 lead in this game, and Dallas Keuchel hadn’t allowed a hit through the 1st 3 innings....
View ArticleIt’s the Defense’s Fault
Twins 4, Astros 2 .Astros Recap There’s nothing more satisfying than waking up on Tuesday to read the recap after a great Astros win on Monday! What? Oh–Neil T So, I must admit, I fell asleep watching...
View ArticleTwins Tumble Astros Down
Twins win rubber game but hey, the Astros outscore Twins 13 to 11 for three game series. LP: Brett Oberholtzer (4-8) WP: Kyle Gibson (11-9) SV: Glen Perkins (30) contributed by Sphinx Drummond Brett...
View ArticleAstros @ Red Sox Series Preview
by Great Bagwell’s Beard You know how when you had a cool substitute teacher, they’d just roll in the a/v cart, pop in a movie, dim the lights and everyone got to watch an age-appropriate movie for...
View ArticleThat Fucking Sixth Inning…
Boston 9 (W: Allen Webster 3-1) Houston 4 (L: Scott Feldman 6-9) Contributed by Mr. Happy This game reminded me of eating fast food. What tastes so good at the very first bite morphs before long into...
View ArticleSea Urchin and Cilantro
Astros 5 Red Sox 3 contributed by NeilT With all the excitement over last night’s first-ever win at Fenway, see, i.e., The Game Zone, there’s really no need for a recap, and that’s for the best because...
View ArticleAltuve Makes ‘Em Pay
Houston 8, Boston 1 W: McHugh (6-9) L: Kelly (2-3) Submitted by Reuben Field the ball. Throw the ball. Step on the base. Wait. Oh crap. Wrong order. A trying rookie year for projected-Hall-of-Famer...
View ArticleThe Astros Do Wop the Yanks
Hit Parade of singles lead to victory over Jeter’s team WP: Feldman (7-9) LP: Huff (3-1) SV: Veras (1) contributed by Sphinx Drummond For the first three innings the Astros could do nothing against the...
View ArticleWhitewashed in the Big Apple!
Yankmees 3 Astros 0 W: McCarthy 8-12 L: Keuchel 10-9 contributed by Mr. Happy In this get away matinee, the New York nine bested the Good Guys 3-0 in a very rare double complete game. Neither starter...
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